Biographies of Jesters (滑稽列傳 Guji Liezhuan) Part Five

Paragraph 5: Yo Meng (優孟) (1/2)

Yo Meng (literally, Meng the Performer, or Master Meng, but less honorific in Chinese) was a court musician who served the Chu Dukedom. Tall, both in height (8 Zhou feet, i.e., 184cm) and in talk, he often offered his advice in joking and jesting (my emphasis: this is often quoted for Sima Qian's definition of guji, or, humor). It was when Chu Zhuangwang reigned. Zhuangwang kept a pet horse and pampered it. The horse was clothed in embroidered silk, housed in magnificent lodging, lulled upon bedding, and fed with delicacy. The horse, sick of obesity, died. Zhuangwang, who made all his subjects mourn for its death, planned to bury it in a manner exclusively due a worthy courtier. All the Duke's men argued otherwise. Zhuangwang in response gave his command, "Whoever attempts to confront me with my decision shall be punished by death." The word reached Yo Meng. He went right into the court and there he wept and wailed hard and loud. Taken by surprise, Zhuangwang inquired the reason of him. Yo Meng answered, "The horse was your favorite, my Lord, and you, as the absolute ruler of such a stately dukedom, hold in hand countless riches and resources. You, however, grudge your beloved horse its due by planning for it a funeral due a mere courtier. I beg of you to grant it a decent funeral due a duke." Zhuangwang said, "How shall I proceed?" Yo Meng replied, "I suggest that my Lord have engraved jade for its bier, fine wood for its coffin and for the coffin padding. Command your strong army to dig its sepulcher; mobilize the weak civilians to carry the building materials. Have the ambassadors of Qi and Zhao on either side, of Han in front and of Wei at the back. In addition, my Lord shall bestow upon it a posthumous award of a rich fief of ten thousand households and shall order the construction of its shrine with offerings all the time ready. Then all dukes shall know how the people are dispensable to you and the horse was not." Zhuangwang then, coming to his senses, said, "How could I ever do such wrong? How can I mend?" "I suggest that my Lord grant it a proper burial due all poultry and livestock--the cooking crater for its coffin, the brass wok for its bier, dressed with spices, scented with herbs. In this manner shall it be shrouded in fire and buried in men's abdomens," Yo Meng answered. Zhuangwang then hurried the carcass to the royal kitchen, lest word of his wrong spread and stay.


*優孟，故楚之樂人也。長八尺，多辯，常以談笑諷諫。楚莊王之時，有所愛馬，衣(yi4)以文繡，置之華屋之下，席以露(lu4)床，啗以棗脯。馬病肥死，使群臣喪(sang1)之，欲以棺槨大夫禮葬之。左右爭之，以為不可。王下令曰：「有敢以馬諫者， 罪至死。」優孟聞之，入殿門。仰天大哭。王驚而問其故。優孟曰：「馬者王之所愛也，以楚國堂堂之大，何求不得，而以大夫禮葬之，薄，請以人君禮葬之。」 王曰：「何如？」對曰：「臣請以彫玉為棺，文梓為槨，楩(pian2)楓豫章為題湊， 發甲卒為穿壙(kuang4)，老弱負土，齊﹑趙陪位於前，韓﹑魏翼衛其後，廟食太牢，奉 以萬戶之邑。諸侯聞之，皆知大王賤人而貴馬也。」王曰：「寡人之過一至此乎！ 為之柰(nai4)何？」優孟曰：「請為大王六畜葬之。以壟竈為槨，銅歷為棺，齎(ji1)以薑棗， 薦以木蘭，祭以糧稻，衣(yi4)以火光，葬之於人腹腸。」於是王乃使以馬屬太官，無令天下久聞也。
**The original paragraph in Chinese is taken from: Sima Qian. Ed. Han Zhaoqi. New Translation Shiji. vol.VIII. Taipei: Sanmin, 2008. 4946-4947. (司馬遷. 韓兆琦 注譯. 新譯史記, 第八冊. 臺北市：三民, 2008. 4946-49467頁. ISBN: 978-95-14-5001-8). All translation is based upon the text and annotations thereof (4948-4949).
***All translation is mine.

Peter McGraw: "To Explain Every Joke Ever"

(Peter McGraw; photo by Andrew Hetherington; reposted from: https://www.wired.com/2011/04/ff-humorcode/)

Recently, I have come across an article on Dr. Peter McGraw and his team's ambition--to find and prove true a universal theory that explains why things are funny and aren't (“One Professor’s Attempt to Explain Every Joke Ever.” qtd. https://www.wired.com/2011/04/ff-humorcode/). Their efforts and research result in their manifesto in print:

McGraw, Peter & Caleb Warren. “Benign Violations: Making Immoral Behavior Funny.” Psychological Science vol. August, 2010.

The gist is that, as taken intact from the journal, "Laughter and amusement result from violations that are simultaneously seen as benign." BVT (the Benign Violation Theory) hence defines funniness as witnessing of an act of or a hint on violation at a secured distance--a threat, but not posed to you, or not posed close enough to you.


While I haven't yet have the time to chew on every sentence of the paper nor sleep on every thought it includes, I decided to have some of his links posted here for future reference.

Dr. Peter McGraw's links:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_McGraw
https://www.colorado.edu/business/peter-mcgraw
https://petermcgraw.org/
https://www.wired.com/2011/04/ff-humorcode/

※ The content of this post and the reference to its sources have never been made known to or approved by Dr. Peter McGraw or http://www.wired.com/magazine/. This blog post is therefore subject to immediate removal upon notice. ※

Biographies of Jesters (滑稽列傳 Guji Liezhuan) Part Four

Paragraph 4: Chunyu Kun (淳于髡) (3/3)

Weiwang was pleased with the withdrawal of the Chu army. He ordered feasts to be arranged and he honored Chunyu Kun with a drink. Weiwang asked, "How much does it take to inebriate my counselor?" Chunyu answered, "I can be drunk on a little, but I can also be drunk on a lot." Weiwang said, "Counselor, if you are drunk on a little, how can you finish a lot? Can you tell me how?" Chunyu said, "When you, my Lord, honor me with a drink at court, with law enforcers on either side, with judicial officials standing behind, I bow low and drink in fear. It takes only a little (a dou) to make me drunk." He continued, "When my parents receive honorable guests at home, I roll up my sleeves and bend over to fill their cups. I stand by at their service and am given a drink from time to time. I hold my cup high and drink to their health in reverence as high. It takes only a few rounds to make me drunk (on two dous)." Chunyu went on to give a third situation, "While socializing with long-lost friends, whom I chanced upon, I rejoice in our conversation of shared old days and in our exchange of life experiences kept to ourselves." "It then takes some more to make me drunk (five or six dous)." "When an informal feast is held in the neighborhood," Chunyu said about the fourth situation, "men and women don't sit apart; people enjoy each other's company and drink for long." "Gambling is allowed; bonding comes natural." "Flirting (holding hands) is inculpable; ogling is acceptable. Earrings are dropped; hairpins, left behind. This caters to my guilty pleasure (This is my péché mignon) and it takes much more to make me drunk (Eight dous equal to slight tipsiness). And further, when the dusk falls and the feast is nearly done, those who linger gather what is left and sit close--men and women share same seats (my emphasis: It is feasible that this means women are sitting in the lap of men, so that everything is piled up or joined "in a pleasant mess": people, shoes, tableware...all things that refer to carnal pleasures); men's shoes are placed upon women's; tableware is piled upon tableware. When the candles burn out from the banquet ball, the host sees off other guests but ask me to stay. This is the time when blouses are loosened and the scent is perceived. This is the moment I favor most. This is the time when I can finish a lot (a dan)." "It is said that drinking without restraint leads to vice; feasting without restraint leads to tragedy. All things under no restraint go in like manner. This is to say that extremities should be avoided, for extremities lead to downfalls." In explaining his toleration for alcohol, Chunyu insinuated a piece of advice into Weiwang's mind. Weiwang replied, "Well said," and restrained from late-night feasting. Chunyu was soon made the supervisor of revelry. When royal banquets were held, Chunyu was always present.

A century and more came to pass. There in Chu was Yo Meng.

*威王大說(yue4)，置酒後宮，召髡賜之酒。問曰：「先生能飲幾何而醉？」對曰：「臣飲一斗亦醉，一石亦醉。」威王曰：「先生飲一斗而醉，惡能飲一石哉！其說可 得聞乎？」髡曰：「賜酒大王之前，執法在傍，御史在後，髡恐懼俯伏而飲，不 過一斗徑醉矣。若親有嚴客，髡帣韝（juan4gou1）鞠？（古字，月+丞+也）(ju2ji4)，侍酒於前，時賜餘瀝，奉觴上壽，數起，飲不過二斗徑醉矣。若朋友交遊，久不相見，卒(cu4)然相睹，歡然道故， 私情相語，飲可五六斗徑醉矣。若乃州閭(lü2)之會，男女雜坐，行酒稽留，六博投壺，相引為曹，握手無罰，目眙(chi4)不禁(jin4)，前有墮珥(er3)，後有遺簪，髡竊樂此， 飲可八斗而醉二參(san1)。日暮酒闌，合尊促坐，男女同席，履舄(xi4)交錯，杯盤狼藉，堂上燭滅，主人留髡而送客，羅襦(ru2)襟解，微聞薌(xiang1)澤，當此之時，髡心最歡，能飲一石。故曰酒極則亂，樂極則悲；萬事盡然，言不可極，極之而衰。」 以諷諫焉。齊王曰：「善。」乃罷長夜之飲，以髡為諸侯主客。宗室置酒，髡嘗在側。

其後百餘年，楚有優孟。

**The original paragraph in Chinese is taken from: Sima Qian. Ed. Han Zhaoqi. New Translation Shiji. vol.VIII. Taipei: Sanmin, 2008. 4941-4942. (司馬遷. 韓兆琦 注譯. 新譯史記, 第八冊. 臺北市：三民, 2008. 4941-4942頁. ISBN: 978-95-14-5001-8). All translation is based upon the text and annotations thereof (4944-4945).

***All translation is mine.